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· "I'm not gonna lie to you guys, I was pretty tipsy back there at McDonald's."
· Eating every other meal at McDonald's.
· Watching 30 Hispanic guys exit a van at a rest stop.
· Ben's unsuccessful attempt to kill us by leaving the gas tank open and flicking
cigarettes at it.
· "Bin bin bin bin bin..."
· Determining that Schutz has no soul but is instead inhabited by the tormented souls of all evil individuals who have killed themselves.
· Alligators riding sharks.
· "Eww, Bin just faced up your pillow."
· "Schutz doesn't wash his face, he just scrapes off a layer with a putty knife."
· Repeatedly joking that Matt never actually reserved a hotel only to discover that no hotel existed at the address he had written down.
· "Honk if You're Horny", "Show Us Your Boobs", and "Girls Gone Wild Film Crew".
· Successfully completing the song 100 Bottles of Beer on the Wall.
· The tiny hotel room that required one person to sleep in the closet each night.
· "Matt, here's a bible for you... if you put it on Schutz's forehead it will start burning the
skin."
· "Bobby, you're so smooth."
· "Aaron, I bought the Atlantic Ocean for you."
· "Matt, what's wrong with your nipples? They're diagonal and spaced too far apart. They're practically under your arms."
· Hitting the beach at 10 am and still managing to get drunk by noon.
· "The password is 'bin'."
· The random gay guy buying Schutz a bottle of water.
· Watching the dancing guy get arrested.
· "Dude, that was the best pizza I've ever had."
· Matt's stalker. "Hey, I saw you were here with your friends. Where are they now? Can I come hang out with you?"
· The funeral service.
· "Is Bobby a virgin?"
· "Okay, thank you. Byyyyyeeeee."
· "We about to bounce up out of here, fo' real."
· "Daddy, I have AIDS."
· "What happened to the money in my wallet? The AIDS must have dissolved
it."
· "That was definitely an AIDS fart."
· Meeting such crazy characters as Choobakka, Marcos, Jack/John, and Giovanni.
· "From now on all you will listen to is FM radio. PERIOD. Muahaha. We will take those Russian Migs straight into Vietnam. PERIOD. Muahaha. I did not promise you a rose garden in Miami Beach. This is not Cincinnati, Ohio. PERIOD. Muahaha. And If you fuck with me, I promise you a duffle bag full of ten gallons of pure Hi-Tec. PERIOD. Muahaha."
· The termites in the bathroom.
· "Seriously, how many of you guys have beat off so far this week?"
· Shorty, and the strange Hispanic guy playing football with us.
· "Seriously, I would do 95 percent of the women down here."
· Porsches, Ferarris, Rolls, Bentlies, Lotuses, 6 Series, Hot Rods, and more.
· Schutz accidentally popping the hood and then getting out while the van was still in reverse.
· Nearly killing the luggage on the roof entering a low parking garage.
· Miami Taxi Cab Company, cab #1865 nearly running us off the road.
· Women bearing it all on the beaches.
· Swimming in an ocean as warm as bath water and clear enough to see your feet.
· Swimming to the buoy. "That's where the sharks are."
· "Are refills free? My Gingerale tastes funny, can I get a Coke instead for free?"
· Joe's Stone Crab House. "Can we eat in there without shirts?"
· $10 daiquiris and $37 steaks.
· "Just go into the bathroom and do what the toilet says."
· The stain in the corner of the stairwell.
· Climbing 15-foot palm trees to get coconuts for our significant others.
· "How much you want for that football? You don't understand what you just did. You just sold us pussy."
· "You fattot!"
· "Mmm... Bobby. Last chance, final."
· Officially being the Burger King for 16 hours straight. "That was a really emo thing to do."
· Justice is Dead.
· That poor gas station bathroom.
· Nearly losing the luggage on the roof on the way back.
· The forest fire and the helicopter landing on the road.
· "Schutz, you devalue life just by existing."
· "I wrote this song for you."
· Being in a car for 19 1/2 hours and consequently seeing the sunset and sunrise all in one trip.
· "Is it cool if I just drop you off here?"
· Discovering and exploring our latent homosexual desires.
· Six Reistersburg kids showing Miami how to live it up.
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